


Time

by flintsjohn



Category: Black Sails
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Love Confessions, M/M, and SMUT, mentions of flint/thomas and silver/madi, pining and misunderstandings, slight angst with happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-25
Updated: 2017-10-25
Packaged: 2019-01-23 04:35:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,094
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12498876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flintsjohn/pseuds/flintsjohn
Summary: A flash of red caught Silver's eye from a few benches away. A man was fast approaching – a type of pace that suggested his pragmatism, Silver noted – and there was something in the way he walked that made John start. Were it only for the ginger hair, he wouldn’t have looked at the man twice – they were in Ireland, for fuck’s sake – but he knew that no-nonsense walk.He stood up just as the man reached his bench, removing any doubts Silver might still have harboured.“James,” he breathed.





	Time

**Author's Note:**

> Hi all! I got a prompt in my creative writing seminar and of course I decided to write a fic! I actually submitted a version of this as my midterm - minus the smut, of course. And, listen, that's probably as far as I'll ever go with smut because I can't,,, write it. Oh, and this is set in Ireland for the one and only reason that I'm in Ireland and the prompt asked for us to describe the local weather lol  
> I just want to thank Sjuul @atamasco/undiscovereduniverse for helping with the amazing beta and feedback, and as always thanks to the freedomkink chat for cheering me on <3 any remaining mistakes are of course mine.  
> Find me at @flintsjohn on tumblr!

Silver stared at the sky. Not a single cloud was in sight that day. The sun was shining brightly in a perfect blue background. Nothing seemed to suggest that it might have rained later, but Silver knew better – he had been living in Ireland for close to six years now, and he was perfectly aware that the weather could change on a whim.

Still, he was enjoying the unexpected good day, sitting on one of the many benches on the promenade, one arm stretched out on the back of the seat as he let the pleasant warmth of the sun wash over him. For a while, he was content to sit with his eyes closed and listen to the waves crashing onto the beach.

Presently, though, he opened his eyes so he could study the passers-by. As a writer, it was one of his favourite ways to spend the time. He liked studying the details in the men and women that walked by him never to be seen again, and imagine what their stories could be, sometimes scribbling notes on random pieces of paper that he carefully filed away for later use.

The old woman that hobbled past him, trying not to lose her dog – was she alone in the world? Was the pet the only thing keeping her from spending her last days in a retirement home? 

And the little kid down on the beach, his hair pushed back from his rosy face by a sudden gust of wind – was he excited because it was his first time near the ocean, or was it simply the naive amazement typical of children that was lighting his expression?

Silver smiled to himself. The day wasn’t particularly busy, despite the sunny weather, so he looked around for more people on which he could apply his little exercise. A flash of red caught his eye from a few benches away. A man was fast approaching – a type of pace that suggested his pragmatism, Silver noted – and there was something in the way he walked that made John start. Were it only for the ginger hair, he wouldn’t have looked at the man twice – they were in Ireland, for fuck’s sake – but he knew that no-nonsense walk. 

He stood up just as the man reached his bench, removing any doubts Silver might still have harboured.

“James,” he breathed. 

Seven years. Seven years since he’d seen him last, and James Flint still had the eerie ability of taking away his breath without moving a finger.

“Hello, John,” Flint replied, burying his hands deeper in the pockets of his jacket like he was feeling uncomfortable.

Silver studied him. To anyone that knew Flint superficially, it might have looked like he hadn’t changed at all in the long years that had separated the two, but to Silver, it was instantly clear that the man had gone through hell since he’d last seen him.

Purple shadows circled Flint’s eyes, dulling the bright sea-green that Silver had spent so long trying to define. Deep creases ran across the man’s forehead that hadn’t been there before, and there were more grey hairs mixed in his ginger manes than those Silver remembered.

“You look... older.” Was what Silver finally said after completing his thorough inspection. Flint only snorted.

To be fair, Silver was sure he himself looked older. Only the week before he’d found his first grey hair and had almost, _almost_ , freaked out. He had also put on more weight than he cared to admit since the accident that took away the bottom half of his left leg. He noticed Flint eyeing the prosthetic, but was grateful when he said nothing.

“How’s life?” he asked, desperately trying not to sound too eager. James shrugged.

Seven years were a long time to be separated for two people who had been as close as they had been – always fiercely pushing and pulling at each other without ever really getting anywhere. Silver wasn’t pleased to admit that the separation had done nothing to dissipate the tension between them.

“How is your wife?”Flint eventually asked, finding nothing better to do than sitting down on the bench. 

Silver copied him before replying, “We had a divorce two years ago.” Despite trying not to let any emotion seep through the words, Silver knew he hadn’t been successful – he could feel his hands trembling along with his voice, and he cleared his throat. He was too proud to admit to anyone that it had been entirely his fault that Madi left him, but the break up hurt nonetheless. 

“And Thomas?” He shot back at Flint, keeping his voice light.

“He died. Last year. Cancer.” Flint touched the wedding band on his ring finger lightly, a fond but sad smile on his lips. Silver instantly regretted the tone he’d used.

“I’m sorry, James.”

They said nothing for a while, observing the passers-by, listening to the sea.

“How did you find me?” Silver asked. It was the easiest of the many questions crowding his head in that moment.

“Max,” Flint said, simply.

_Of course_ , Silver thought. His best friend wasn’t exactly a pro at keeping her mouth shut, and the fact that she was James’s friend, too, didn’t help. He was surprised she hadn’t told him about Thomas, but he guessed that Flint would have wanted to deliver the news himself, if he was planning on showing up there.

Silver sighed. “What are you doing here, James?”

As he waited for the man to reply, Silver looked around. The street was deserted as it was now close to lunch time. _Just perfect_ , he thought. He knew what conversation they were about to face, and it was bound to get ugly rather quickly, considering where they’d left off.

“I’ve been thinking,” Flint started, “When Thomas – since he passed I’ve been thinking about the past few years. What happened, what could have been different.”

Silver nodded along, but inside his head a voice was screaming at him to just _run_ , because the fight he had been dreading for seven years was a stone’s throw away. 

“It got me thinking about how Thomas and I met, and the part you had in it.”

There it was. Silver squeezed his eyes shut, anxiety pooling in his belly as he felt Flint turn to face him.

“I guess in the end there is something I can thank you for,” he continued, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

“You deserved better than what I could give you, and Thomas-“

“Don’t you think I would’ve liked to have a say in that? Jesus, you’re still the selfish little shit you were seven years ago!”

Silver nodded again, subdued. He couldn’t bring himself to lift his eyes to Flint’s face – what could he reply to that? The man was right. He had made a choice for both of them all those years ago. He had panicked and done what he had always done best: he’d run.

In that moment, as Flint shook with barely repressed rage next to him on the bench, he knew that he owed the man an explanation. After that, they could part in mutual indifference and move on with their lives. That was what Flint was there for, wasn’t it? Silver breathed in deeply, and started speaking.

“I fell in love with you within a month of meeting you at Columbia – I admired you from the first instant for how proud and open you were with your sexuality, in a time during which I was still so confused about mine. During those months, working for you, I learned a lot, but I wasn’t doing what I truly dreamed of. I wanted to write. You know that, I told you that countless times. 

“By the time they offered me a contract I was struggling to pay my rent with my assistant’s pay and it was – I knew it was too generous for a first deal and that there _had_ to be some trick hidden there. I had just come out to my agent, so I guess that’s how the editors found out. One of the terms was that I couldn’t come out, at least until I brought some money into their pockets. If I refused, or tried to fight them... they would have ‘accidentally’-“ Silver snorted and made air quotes with his fingers “- outed me instead. 

“I was young, I hadn’t made my name anywhere. I was terrified that would have put my career in the ground before it’d even started. At that point, it was either that, or going back to Australia to live with my parents. I was so scared, and I chose success over my love for you.”

Flint was silent for a long time after Silver finished his confession, his gaze lost in the rolling waves. “You- why didn’t you tell me?” he whispered at last.

“So you could’ve, what? Sued them?” Silver shrugged, “I guess I thought getting you involved would’ve only made things worse. I hadn’t told you anything about how I felt, so I just accepted the deal and packed my bags. Thomas came in as a substitute, and you know the rest.”

Silence fell again. It was making Silver antsy. He started fidgeting with a loose string in his hoodie. 

“All these years, and I always thought you were ashamed, that – _John_ ,” Flint turned to him again, his eyes filled with pain and regret, “I always thought you wanted nothing to do with me. That maybe I had pushed too hard and-“

“You sure have some hero complex, don’t you?” Silver smiled, but it was a sad and pitiful thing. “I never would have forced you into a secret relationship, so I left before any of our feelings developed more. I moved here a year later and met Madi and, well...”

They both fell silent again, but it was somehow lighter. The tension that had been building between them since they’d first set eyes on each other dissipated into the quiet.

“It didn’t work.” Silver admitted at last.

Flint’s brow furrowed in confusion. “What didn’t?”

“Running away. Trying to escape before my feelings got the best of me. I already loved you by the time I left.” Then he added, with a small grin, “Never really stopped.”

A breath caught in Silver’s throat as his eyes met Flint’s. The expression on the man’s face was wild with barely repressed feelings that battled among themselves to get to the surface.

“Do you still...?” Flint forced out. 

The question lingered in the breeze as Silver studied Flint’s face. Did he? Jesus, of course he did. In the seven years they’d been apart, there hadn’t been a day that Silver hadn’t thought about Flint. He’d spent so much time regretting each and every decision that had helped to divide them that he’d lost track of _why_ he felt so angry. The truth was, he was furious at himself for having lost the chance of knowing what loving and being loved by this man could feel like. And now, there it was, handed back to him by Flint himself.

“I do,” Silver breathed finally, “I’m still in love with you, James.”

That did it – they crashed into each other in a fit of passion that had built during the long years of separation. They clung to each other as the wind picked up and the sky clouded ominously. Silver would’ve thought that their unleashed emotions had been able to affect the weather, if he didn’t know Ireland as well as he did.

“Let’s get out of here,” he said as he finally drew back to take in some air, cupping Flint’s cheek.

It started raining as they made their way to Silver’s house, and by the time they’d reached the flat, they were soaked through, but laughing and holding onto each other as they kissed carelessly in the rain.

Flint tucked a stray damp curl behind Silver’s ear as they stood in the hall, smiling almost shyly at each other. Silver had started shivering, but he wasn’t sure whether it was for the cold or because Flint was gently caressing his face with the tips of his fingers. The feeling ignited a fire deep in his belly that made his eyes glaze with lust and his cheeks burn.

“James, I-“ 

He was cut off with a forceful kiss. Silver’s fingers wound their way through Flint’s short hair as he was backed into the nearest wall, a leg already pushing between his thighs to give him some friction. Soon enough, Silver had to break away from Flint’s lips for some air, and the man took advantage of it, quickly switching Silver’s lips for his neck.  
Silver felt his knees grow weaker with each kiss, but at the same time he was trying to stave off the stupid, _stupid_ anxiety that was making his lungs tighter by the second. He tried to distract himself by letting his hands wander down James’s back, but in the end he had to push the man back with a small, apologetic sigh.

“Do you want some wine?” he asked sheepishly, running off to the kitchen as fast as his prosthesis allowed.

“Uh. Sure?” Flint followed him after a few seconds, a perplexed expression on his face. “Is everything alright?”

“What? Yeah.” Silver busied himself with uncorking and serving the wine, ignoring the fact that his hands were shaking terribly and that several drops fell out of the glasses onto the countertop.

“John,” Flint started as he accepted the wine, “We don’t have to do anything if you’re not ready.”

“ _You’re_ not ready,” Silver mumbled childishly, dropping onto the sofa with a dejected sigh. He shook his head before replying, “I _do_ want it, James. It’s just – I’m – I’m different than what you remember and I’ve never – let’s just say I don’t have that much experience.”

Flint sat at his side and placed a gentle hand on Silver’s thigh. “It’s alright. We can go as slow as you need us to. As for your leg – I can’t say how I’ll react at seeing it, but please know that I don’t see you as less for it. Quite the opposite.”

Silver gazed into his glass for some time, worrying at his bottom lip – Flint noticed proudly that it was plump and red from their make-out session – before turning to him with a grin. “Are you going to teach me?”

Flint chuckled and leaned in to kiss him, careful not to knock over the glasses – which he moved to the side table as soon as the kiss got heated. He gestured Silver to move on his lap, which he did, enthusiastically. Flint drew him closer, his finger intertwining with Silver’s soft curls and eliciting a moan from the man.

“Please, James,” Silver whined, grinding his hips down to get some friction.

“Are you sure?” Flint studied him, a hand firmly placed on Silver’s cheek so he could watch his eyes. 

Silver nodded wildly, pressing fervent kisses to Flint’s jaw and neck. “Take me to bed, please, _please_ , I’m sure, I want you.” 

A moment later, Silver felt himself being lifted from the couch and he clung to Flint with a squeak that quickly transitioned into a fit of giggles as Flint held tightly onto his ass to carry him to the bedroom, only mistaking the room once – which sent Silver nearly into hysterics. He marginally calmed down as Flint carefully set him on the bed and started stripping, mainly so he could enjoy all the glorious freckled skin that was finally being revealed to him.

He scrambled out of his own clothes as he realized he was probably overdressed, and only hesitated for a second when he got to his prosthetic, finally unbuckling it and setting it to the side with a deep breath. He turned again to see Flint watching him fondly from where he’d settled on the other side of the bed. Silver could feel colour rise to his cheeks, but tried to ignore it in favour of letting his eyes wander over Flint’s exposed body. He tentatively reached a hand out, letting it hover over Flint’s chest as he bit his lip. 

“You can touch, you know.” Flint smiled, catching his hand to guide it to his own chest. Silver gained confidence as he acquainted himself with Flint’s body, finding out the spots that made him moan, the ones where he was ticklish, the ones that made him shy away. 

They explored each other unhurriedly, like they were trying to catch up on all the time they’d lost. Eventually, Flint moved them so they could lie on their sides, avoiding putting too much pressure on Silver’s injured leg. Flint’s chest was pressed to Silver’s back as he opened him up. Silver moaned unashamedly, grinding back into Flint’s fingers as his hand clenched and released in the sheet. 

For some moments after Flint had finally eased into Silver’s pliant body he was too distracted by the tight heat to pay attention to anything else – until he heard a stifled sob, and froze. 

“Please don’t stop,” Silver gasped, wiping angrily at his face.

“John-“

“ _Please_.” Silver ground back again and scrambled to catch Flint’s hand where it was holding tightly to his hip. The first few thrusts were unsure, but they quickly found their rhythm – one that soon made Silver throw his head back to rest it on Flint’s shoulder, giving his lover the opportunity to whisper in his ear.

“You look amazing like this, John, so beautiful for me, darling.” Silver moaned at the words, holding fast to Flint’s hand as they both got closer to their release. He was vaguely aware that tears were still streaming down his cheeks, but Flint was being so gentle and loving that he couldn’t hold back anymore.

After, they lied tangled together on the messed-up bed, Silver’s head on Flint’s chest. They were silent again, like on the bench hours earlier, but the air was now filled with love and happiness, rather than rage and tension. Silver knew that what happened didn’t nearly come close to resolving every misunderstanding between them, that they eventually would have to talk about everything that had happened since he’d left, but in that moment it didn’t really matter. Nothing was stopping them now – no contract, no terms to agree to. They had time to get soaked by the rain and to get dry again. They had time to stay in bed all day. They had time to discuss things, and to figure each other out. They had time.


End file.
